Save the Strays

[kwheller]

The drawing, "Save the Strays" is a social action piece depicting the dire circumstances of stray animals and the willingness of some people to help. This is drawn with Staedtler pencils (6 B to 6 H) on Bristol (Plate finish). Although the dog may appear to be a Border Collie, it is a mixed breed. The natural fading light that I took this in made the drawing a little yellowish toned and that is not the case. I'm still working on this drawing, but would appreciate any comments. Thanks!

[Mike Sibley]

KATHY-Save the Strays1.jpg

It's a lovely subject, and you've told the story very well.

A couple of things bother me - mainly to do with the Subaru.

First is that intake to the right of the lady's face. I'm assuming it's a hole with depth? In that case, you need to smooth your drawing, because sketchy shading makes it look flat. The same applies to the car's grill. Neither need be dark, but their dark depths should be both solid and featureless. Otherwise, none are holes, just patches on the surface.

And the same applies to the car itself. I'm sure Subaru cars come in many colours, but none, as far as I know, feature the "hand drawn" look. It's metal, shiny, and smooth. You could try blending, but those pencil lines really have to go - especially down the darker side of the car.

I didn't have time to smooth it, so I just blurred the car's body to simulate smooth shading - including the grill. That shows how the smooth body, and softened grill, now contrast with the sharply-drawn, contrasty hat, which creates more division and recession. The hat springs forward of the car, although there's an unfortunate light patch on the car, running down the right-hand side of the hat, which looks false. I corrected that, and now the hat separates out better. You might also consider softening the Subaru badge, because it has a tendency to look like a bobble on the hat.

While you might think these things don't impact the drawing, I'd contend that they certainly do. They drag the whole piece down to a "drawing" and lose all sense of reality.

On the other hand, I was interested in that dark, top-right joint in the stonework. It's an excellent stopper!

KATHY-Save the Strays2.jpg

Take it away and the whole feel of the piece changes. For the worse.

With it, the composition works wonderfully well. I love the shaping, texture and folds within the lady's jumper. And the side seam that says "jeans". They couldn't be anything but denim. Composition-wise, if you apply the rule of thirds, the lady's head sits perfectly on the top left-hand hotspot. And the dog's head is just beneath the right-hand hotspot, which possibly emphasises its plight.

[kwheller]

KATHY-Save the Strays1.jpg
It's a lovely subject, and you've told the story very well.

Composition-wise, if you apply the rule of thirds, the lady's head sits perfectly on the top left-hand hotspot. And the dog's head is just beneath the right-hand hotspot, which possibly emphasises its plight.

HI Mike,
Thanks for the wonderful feedback1 You are correct that I intentionally drew the dogs head just below the right-hand hotspot for the stated reason. I am thrilled you saw that subtle compositional decision. Thank you for the stonework comment, I thought it was necessary to have that top-right joint included (I also did try without it). So nice to have confirmation on these things.

Yes, the car is problematic and your comments are excellent ones that I am going to use. I am so use to drawing the natural world, that I realized that the shiny, metal, smooth car continues to need work and you have clarified the problems. I do believe its important to get it as realistic as possible and the pencil lines do need to go.

Also, you are the second person to say that the Subaru badge looks like a bobble on the hat. I tried to fix that by overlapping the top of the hat more over the badge, but softening the badge sounds like a good idea. I'll have to play around more with that since it is typically a sharp edge. Perhaps darkening and trying for a smoother transition will pull it into the background. (I wish I had realized this hat bobble problem or I would have had the hat overlap the badge even more, but I can't change the hat that much at this point).

Thanks again!

[LindasPencils]

This is a nicely themed drawing that captures the story well.
Regarding the car, while I agree that it should have the pencil lines removed, I would also caution about making the car too realistically obvious. In other words, you must be careful that you don't allow the car to dominate the scene by making it look too in focus or shiny. The story is of the woman and the stray, not the car she picks it up with. There is a danger the car could distract. So I would suggest toning it back somewhat, perhaps with an overall light F pencil blend?
Another thing that slightly bothers me is the area around the womans left (our left) shoulder. While the car skirt shadow may not show in your photo, I think that it should here, otherwise it doesn't 'read' to me as continuing. It is just a blank bit of paper, not the continuation of the car. Perhaps a bit of dark shadow edge or toned gradiation?
In future, watch the size of the hands of people. Photo lenses tend to distort. I think you get away with the small hand in this instance because our eye follows the womans gaze and gesture down the arm to the hand reaching down to the dog in a continuous line and it reads well. But if that hand was any smaller I would find it distracting!
Well done on creating such an interesting themed drawing.

[PogArt-Ttoo]

It’s really well thought this drawing
At a first look at it ~ the message is striking immediately
Just follow Linda’s and Mike’s advice to make sure your next artwork will be improved at the parts where it can , and your detailed work will be focused onto the main story, so the rest of the drawing doesn’t need to get as much attention

[kwheller]

There is a danger the car could distract. So I would suggest toning it back somewhat, perhaps with an overall light F pencil blend?
Perhaps a bit of dark shadow edge or toned gradiation?
In future, watch the size of the hands of people
Well done on creating such an interesting themed drawing.

Thanks so much for your helpful comments. Sorry I didn't reply sooner, I was busy making changes based on your wonderful suggestions. I have put the car more in the background (great idea with a light F pencil) and addressed Mike's comments. I also addressed the shadow edge of the left shoulder. I actually struggled with the size of the hand because it was superimposed on the draft Photoshop that was used to put together the elements of the composition. (I must admit I had several photos taken of a woman in that position with the hand extended outward in various poses to try to get it right, but photos can be deceiving.). Thanks so much for your wonderful comments!

[kwheller]

At a first look at it ~ the message is striking immediately

Thank you so much for your encouragement and comments. I always appreciate your input!

[PogArt-Ttoo]

You always welcome
The only problem is ~ I’m visiting this forum very rare, because I’m banned from logging in as my email is on black SPAM list, and nobody can fix it…
It cost me couple of misses and hits to eventually post anything in here…
Best wishes.
Art.

[Laurene]

I can’t add to the wonderful advice given above, but I did want to congratulate you on the strong sense of story or message that comes through loud and clear in your artwork. I was immediately drawn to the emotion in the dog’s face. It’s almost as if I can feel him asking for help.