Yellowstone River Otter

[JayS]

Ah, you raise an interesting question, the question of "if." For me the focus is lost in darkness and complexity. Therefore, in order to keep the focus on Big Bob the following is required; 1) Bob's companion looking at him and the fish gives powerful direction toward Bob. 2) The shape of the water also moves the eye toward Bob. 3) The rocks on the bank are also pointing directly toward Bob.
I admit that the movement of the water makes me a little nervous. The shapes are distracting. Maybe I can smooth them out a little.

[JayS]

Progress?
I've spent the last four days working on a kitchen remodel. A friend came to the house and said to my wife, "He's trying to make an art project out of it." So much for what I otter be doing...

[JayS]

Just a wild hare, "Where have all my friend gone?"

[Mike Sibley]

I think there's a real risk of you losing the otters in the water. I understand what you're doing, but I don't think it's working the way you intended. Why? I'm not certain, but I suspect those hard edges and flat shapes in the water are just causing confusion and dragging my eye away from the otters.

Well, that probably a bit too simplistic. I'm not sure the water actually needs all that amount of disturbance. And I suspect if the water was less detailed, it could act as a backdrop to splashes and falling drops of water from the fish. And I mean really brilliant white, very sharp-edged drops. Perhaps with a swirl of dark water in that area to provide as much contrast as possible. That should draw the eye in.

I wish I could be more definitive, but at present I'm not immediately reading the water as being water. And that's distracting my attention. Is the water your invention, or as seen in reference? I'll sleep on it and try again tomorrow

[Mike Sibley]

Oh, one thing I can suggest. I'm really finding that line under the body of Bob's mate to be rather unnatural. Might I propose replacing it with a broken line of white? Image surface tension. OK, that wouldn't occur in moving water, but the eye will read and understand it as being water meeting slick fur - possibly as little splashes rather than tension. But I'm quite certain that would work.

You originally left that area white, which works - it's just the line that looks false.

[JayS]

I understand. The more contrast the greater the focus on the dark otters. When looking at the image on the drawing board the water appears lighter. I think I need to move the drawing a few feet away and look at it from a distance? The other possible solution that comes to mind is to develop some really white splashes around Bob. This may bring contrast into play without trying to make a dark river light?

[Mike Sibley]

I understand. The more contrast, the greater the focus on the dark otters.

And I meant the reverse. The more you can lower the contrast in the water - and the sharp edges - the more prominence the otters will gain. I understand this is my vision and not yours. It's your drawing, so you'll be far more aware of what you're trying to achieve.

...to develop some really white splashes around Bob. This may bring contrast into play without trying to make a dark river light?

...or that Or both - I strongly believe that a spray of brilliant white water drops falling from (or being splashed by) Bob and the fish would work very well. In that case, engineering a dark patch of water behind the splashes would be ideal. Like these (indented in the second example):

Water-Splashes-1.jpg

Water-Splashes-2.jpg

Both were to realistically connect the animal to the water, and I think Bob and the fish would benefit the same way - but with very sharp and white drops, to draw the eye to them.

Also, the water in the top one was pure invention, but it deliberately contains no hard edges. That's not just because I think water flows sinuously, but because sharp edges - especially when coupled with dark values - would immediately vie with the dog for attention. The water is definitely a secondary element.

I think I need to move the drawing a few feet away and look at it from a distance?

Never a bad idea. I have a ritual on completion I cover the drawing for a week (long enough, so I can't exactly remember every aspect of it), pick it up unseen, pin it to the wall with Blu-Tack, walk away, and turn round. That's the first time I see the drawing the way everyone else will. And sometimes I'll see an imbalance that needs to be corrected.

[JayS]

Hi Mike, I still think I understand. You and I were saying the same thing, but I wasn't saying it very well. Perhaps because I was thinking about the contrast between different objects like Bob and the water. When I shift focus to the water alone, I better see the relationships within the same object moderated by contrast. language is confusing. My computer has now taken to noting whether I'm using the English EN or AM word.

I have not made any significant adjustments to the water yet.

[JayS]

Mike, Thank you for your comments. They are very helpful.

[Wassie]

I think this is going to be a great drawing. I like Yellowstone Bob. Just one tiny critique, be tone down the highlight on his ear. It almost looks like he has 2 eyes on that side. Keep going! You're off to a good start.